Toying Around -T+M-

It was the morning after Max's birthday.  The blue kangaroo joey's birthday party had been fairly enjoyable; the cake was delicious, he got several presents he liked, and his older sister Tanya had even agreed to call a truce for the day.

Now, however, the magic seemed to be gone.

Although Max was fairly mature for his age, most of his gifts had been toys and other child-oriented knickknacks.  The only thing that held his interest for fairly long had been the Dinodroid™ remote-controlled robot lizard, modeled after the villain of a popular kids' TV show.  And indeed, that was the one he was playing with now.

The joey pressed a button on the remote.  Across the room, the robot let out a roar and put its arms back.

Yeah, yeah.  You press this button, it roars.  You press that button, it speaks.  You tilt that joystick, it walks around.  I've seen it all already.

Max discarded the remote and walked up to the robot.  "Dinodroid™, I don't see what other kids see in you.  You're as predictable as... well, as a remote-controlled robot.  How do you do all that stuff, anyhow?  I'd like to find out..."

Getting an idea, Max darted out of the room for a moment before returning with a screwdriver.  He then began to undo its joints and remove its casing in an attempt to discover exactly what made it tick.

Every part he removed, he examined with a magnifying glass to try to determine what it did.

I get it.  This is the motor that makes the Dinodroid's™ arm move... and that's the voice box through which it roars and speaks...

About an hour later, the robot was completely dismantled.  Max admired his handiwork; parts littered several square feet of the floor.

That wasn't so hard.  Maybe I should look into becoming a mechanic when I grow up.  Now I guess I should clean all this up before someone steps on it.

Max spent another few minutes gathering up all the parts and placing them in an empty bag.  Screws, wires, motors, plastic casing, he picked it all up, recalling where each part went as he did.

Finally he picked up the last part: the Dinodroid's™ main receiving unit, where the signals from the remote were received, decoded, and sent to the rest of the robot's body as instructions.  But before putting it in the bag... he hesitated.

Hmmm... I wonder...

Sticking the bag into the corner of his closet, the joey carried the remote and the receiving unit out the door of his room and down to the den, where his magenta teenaged sister Tanya was busy cleaning up the room from the party the day before.  Right now she was busy vacuuming up some confetti, and hadn't yet noticed him.

Max eyed the vacuum cleaner warily, as if it were a deathtrap; Tanya had actually vacuumed him up a few times, and he wasn't in any hurry to let it happen again.

As the magenta kangaroo knelt down to vacuum under the sofa, her brother navigated skillfully closer, then flipped over the armrest and landed right in front of her.

Hearing the couch creak, Tanya glanced up.  "Oh, hi, Max.  What ar-- GUFF!"

That was all she got to say before Max stuffed the Dinodroid's™ receiver into her mouth, then forced her to swallow it with a well-aimed kick to the jaw.

"Ouch!  Max, what was tha-- ... ... ..."

Tanya fell silent and dropped the vacuum cleaner.  Her posture grew rigid, and her expression blank.  It was as if she was brainwashed.

Smiling, Max reached over and turned off the vacuum (better safe than sorry), then pressed one of the buttons on the Dinodroid™ remote.

"BOW DOWN BEFORE ME, INFERIOR SCUM," the magenta kangaroo pronounced in a borderline-monotone voice.

YEEEEES!  It worked!

Max pumped his fists in the air, then tilted a joystick.  In response, Tanya obediently turned around and began to walk towards the front door.  Her brother followed closely, fine-tuning her movements so she wouldn't crash into anything.

"Mom, Tanya and I are headed outside to play for a little while," Max called to his mother as he and Tanya passed by the kitchen.

"Alright, don't get into any trouble," their mother replied without looking.

Since the Dinodroid™ didn't have any buttons for turning a doorknob, the blue joey had to open the door for his remote-controlled sister.  Once they were outside, he climbed up on top of her to ride on her shoulders.

"I'm the king of the world!" Max cheered as he controlled Tanya down the street.  He now had his sister completely at his mercy... the possibilities were endless!  What would he do first?

That question was answered quickly as he noticed they were passing Gregory's house.

Gregory was a brown grizzly bear with a lot of muscle and not a lot of temper.  He lived not far from Tanya and Max, and stood about a foot and a half taller than Tanya did.  Rumor had it he had a collection of people who'd ticked him off all stuffed into bottles and on display over his fireplace.

Perfect.

After directing Tanya onto the front porch, Max rang the doorbell and hid around the corner.  A moment later, Gregory answered the door.

"What do you want?"

"BOW DOWN BEFORE ME, INFERIOR SCUM," Tanya replied, at the command of a button press.

Gregory jumped.  "What did you say?!"

"YOU CANNOT HOPE TO POSE A THREAT TO ME.  BOW DOWN BEFORE ME, INFERIOR SCUM."

"Take that back, you little twerp!  What gives you a right to ring my doorbell and hurl insults at me?"

"YOU CANNOT HOPE TO POSE A THREAT TO ME."

"Playing it that way, eh?  You have five seconds to get off my porch before I clobber you.  One.  Two."

Max snickered from his hiding place.  Tanya didn't budge because he wasn't pressing anything.

"Three.  Four.  Five.  Alright, that's it!"

The grizzly bear threw a right hook at the magenta kangaroo, nailing her square in the cheek.  She took the hit, but didn't respond to it, nor to any of the fifteen others he threw in quick succession.

At one point, Gregory nailed Tanya in the chest at just the right angle, forcing her to cough up the Dinodroid's™ receiver.  Without it, she began to come to her senses, but at this point no amount of consciousness would do her any good as he dragged her inside to continue the beatdown.

By now Max was doubled over in laughter.  He fetched the receiver, then moved to the window to watch.

Tanya knew she was in trouble.  She tried to protest, but Gregory was too angry to listen to a word she said.  She then made an attempts to fight back, but this too was futile; her strong kangaroo legs were no match for the grizzly bear's muscle.

The skirmish came to an end when Gregory belly-flopped on top of Tanya, squishing her flat against the hardwood floor.  Then he stood up and carefully peeled her off his stomach.  He was saying something, but the window was closed so Max couldn't hear a thing.

After a short pause, the grizzly folded the magenta kangaroo into a neat rectangle, then draped her over a chair and walked out of sight.

Max grinned.  This had all gone spectacularly.  He glanced at the receiver and remote in his hands, the two tools which had made the whole prank possible.

I'm saving these.  Who knows when they'll come in handy again?

He would see about rescuing his sister in about half an hour.